Flo Carson

Flo Carson - Social Anthropologist, studying International Development at Sciences Po, Paris. I am slightly obsessed by gender, politics, media, human rights and global health. I've worked in Asia, Africa and Europe and keen to explore more of the world we live in. Take a look at my Twitter & Tumblr for my most recent posts. tly

Monday 27 January 2014

My First Delhi Weekend

My experience of India so far has been filled with a lot of feelings. Maybe, all of the feelings a human can possibly feel? And I've been here for less than a week. So I suppose that is an achievement, if nothing else really has been.

There has been no other period in my life where I have felt such extreme highs and lows in such a short period of time. But I suppose that is what I should expect from this great nation.

On arrival to Delhi, I was anxious and uncomfortable about what my time here would consist of. I had  no idea who would collect me from the airport, where my hotel actually was and what I was to do for my first weekend. Fortunately, I was met outside the airport with a sign and a smile by my friendly hotel driver (this was the second time I have arrived in an air port and seen a sign with my name held up, and I have to admit I love it each and every time. It makes me feel like an international jet setter with meetings established across the world).

Once I arrived to Grand Godwin Hotel, in Para Ganj ( a horrific touristy part of the capital) I collapsed into my bed (in a room with no windows) and simultaneously released all of the emotions in my body. Most of them were negative, like anxiety, fear and loneliness all collectively seeping out of my eyes, nose and mouth. I called everyone I possibly could over Skype, multiple times every hour, and vented my regrets and disappointment with my decision at them.

This happened for approximately 48 hours. In fact, I can't be sure whether it was actually 48 hours, due to the lack of natural sunlight entering my room which inevitably confused my body even more.  I'm ashamed to say I only left the hotel once in the weekend, due to my ridiculous hyper sensitivity and proneness to welling up every 15 seconds. But as I left the hotel and wandered down the road, I was able to witness some of the sights that reminded me of why I do love this country so much. A dog sitting on top of a car. Men with scarves elaborately wrapped around their heads and necks, sipping their chai briskly in the cold. I also saw a man get run over. Really slowly. Without reacting in any way.

By the third day, my emotions had internalised. I was no longer spurting snot or tears, and instead had a steady (yet unnaturally fast) heart beat. It was my first day of my internship with Apne Aap.


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